I deserve to go hell because i'm so careless and i neglected them, i let them died.. i thought i have done what i could, my best but turned out i haven't, it all gone in vain..but i hope they'll go to heaven... till this day i still think of them.. the ones i lost, the thought of turning back time when they were alive and save them from me is crossing my mind every single time.. Thank you god that at least you leave me with 2 beautiful babies, a legacy from bonnie, my pretty girl, i'm sorry for what happened, for not taking care of you better, i thought i could do it, treat you by myself, if only i saw how much of a fool i was and brought you to the doctor sooner, you might have been still here in my arm begging for food.. Minnie my first love, people say you cant ever forget your first love and they are right, you're still in my heart always, losing you because of stupid mistake is one of my greatest regret. When you first came it wasn't a love of first sight...